Myanmar

今年二月终于踏足缅甸。

花了三个月的时间整理心情终于有动力来写后记。其实与其说动力，还不如说是因为现实生活中的窒息感让我想用文字来抒发和缅怀二月那短短七天的时光




缅甸的精彩在于他是一个新开放的国家，因为新，所以有无限的可能和机会
路上除了仆仆尘土，看到的尽是旧车，左架和右架的都有。

缅甸是一个可以颠覆你思想的国度，汽车在这里由于新车禁止入口与车牌管制问题变得和黄金一样可以收藏保值。而人民对黄金和纸钞被偷或抢的警觉心甚低，全放在显眼处任君欣赏。




















每一百个人平均只有五个人有手机，普通SIM卡就要价两百美金。所以基本上在缅甸很难得才会看见电话店

在这个随时被政策倒打一耙的国度商家收现款时都会格外审查。尤其是如果你持有的美金是旧钞或有折痕商家一律不收。原因是国家政策速度变化之快今天的钞票可能明天就会变成一叠废纸。这也促使了本地人收藏金块的习惯。

想起了启程前做功课时某处读到关于缅甸的这句话 「只能抬頭望，不能低頭看。」

确实，在缅甸抬头望天看到蓝天白云，雄伟的金色庙宇；低头看到的却是坑坑洞洞，还有一坨坨红色槟榔咀嚼的唾液痕迹

一直对缅甸有个印象就是权威封锁的国家，老实说除了翁山蘇姬和佛教圣地，对缅甸一无所知。

趁着马车奔波时，我开口问了车夫对他们来说佛陀和翁山蘇姬谁对他们比较重要

车夫mao mao咬着红色的槟榔咧牙笑笑的回答说：“翁山蘇姬是妈妈，佛祖是爸爸。”

缅甸的精髓在于生活中那些微不足道却又异常精妙的小发现
刚到的第二天对车夫说我们要吃便宜道地的食物，车夫点了点头带我们到一个路边并不怎么起眼的小茅屋。

一坐下发现与店员沟通不来，只好指指点点的点了隔壁阿伯一样的汤面。付钱时说实话有点震惊。一碗马币五块的面在那里只要二十仙。当下真有想永远呆在缅甸的感觉

又有谁会想到在街边那小小的档口，居然有着不太卫生但却有着那可以让你想长期居住曼德勒的咖哩鸡腿！

身处Mahagandayon monastry时发先其实小和尚拥有的比起城市的小孩真的是太多太多。

简单的一根小树枝和沙地他们就可以创造出自己的一个小宇宙，任由他们自由的挥霍生命中的精彩也是到了缅甸才知道，原来螃蟹，鸭肉和猪肉掺杂在一起煮食居然有那么意想不到的美味

幸福其实很简单，一样的，简单也可以很幸福。




















去缅甸之前一直对缅甸有个向往
很喜欢到还未被侵入的国家去体验那些未繁华的空气，也想去体验从前人们那简单朴实的生活。

第一天抵达时看着夜里的缅甸，一番久违的寂静沉默中偶尔传来虫鸣声
连续几天的马车和夜车奔波心从没真正的平静下来

每一步走在凹凸不平的沙子路上心一直急着寻找答案为何这块曾被庇佑的大地为何没有应得的繁华。

这里除了阳光似乎就只有黑暗。
让人不禁感叹为了迎接民主的到来总是会有黑暗。直到那炬火光到来。

这片纯真的国土一沙一石都是那么的赤裸裸摆在眼前，多余的点缀修饰在这里都只能扮演着无关紧要的角色。

这趟路途参观了无数的庙宇，说真的连脱鞋和穿鞋就不下百次。
可每一次穿鞋离开前看着自己那黑黑的脚丫，发现自己与另一半都成长了一些。

飞机起飞离开那霎那突然回想到那晚看着繁星篇空的博干的心情。

无奈的感慨自己心坎与时间上的空虚，反思自己与缅甸的平民相比其实只多出了几张被赋予
不同定义的纸张和不属于自己的物质负累


感觉飞机爬升时只带走了身体躯壳，遗留下了心灵某部分和长久以来的郁闷
身心分离，想起夜里马车回档的声音和那冷得入骨的空气，盼望着另一端的世界

加速，回首与另一半看日出那一刻，
感觉心都放宽了



在缅甸留下了深深的足迹，也留下了一部分的自己。

Of flaws

There has been this one thing

This something inside me that kept reaching out for beyond. I think the mistake was overseeing what's beyond but ignored what's within..

Maybe what's really important is to really walk 99 steps further and end it all. Yet I am still clinging to those things like a child. Being grateful maybe is really a choice. It all comes down to how much you are holding on and how much you willing to give. History repeats, only through a different railway.

It is not good to complain and yell like anyone cares. At the end people are for themselves, even closest one.

Maybe it really is like that, some people like you, some people don't. The most important thing is really, just be yourself. But the question is, how long do you need to find it?

Few days ago I was asked the question:" Who inspired you?"

I didn't gave my answer simply because I got no answer. Everything in my life inspired me and moulded me to become the person I am today. And I think most of the time its more towards who inspired you to not be like the person they are. And what happen today will definitely change how I am tomorrow and days to come.



Throughout my life there have been so many role models but in the end as I know them more I see the flaws. Everyone has flaws, its just a matter of time for you to find it out. I love flaws. To see the flaw is the better way for you to love someone, for you have accepted it.

So here is to flaws, for being such a beautiful thing.

I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.” 
― Augusten Burroughs.

Because we are the people

6/5/2013, We might have lost the election. But we won the war.

If you were staying up late like most of the people did last night, I believed you have seen the intensity of our PM's face once BN had declared victory over PR. That, for me is not a winning face, let alone her wife's which probably was due to the botox injection.

Their words might not be the truth but the fear in their face is real. WE, you and me and 10 others millions of people who voted yesterday made a cause.

If PR managed to take their case to the court for appeal (which seem impossible now) will be great, but for now I think the more realistic way is to look forward and preparing for what's coming in the next five years.

Take it or not, it was never a question if BN will extend its decades-long grip on power in this never before hotly competitive election. Bear in mind that they only need 112 to be the slim majority government whereas Johor, Sabah, and Sarawak which was said to be BN's castle already contributed 82 seats which is 73% of what the party needed to be in power. That said, out of 133 parliamentary seats won by BN, UMNO contributed 88 by contesting 119 seats this time.

Although PR victory is not big this time, it did make progress by retaining 7 mores seats to 89 albeit of what actually happened yesterday. PR retained Penang states government which is a good news because if it doesn't, it will how how shallow Malaysian is to be affected by money politic. That is, one hope for our nation.

Malaysia internet penetration rate is at 62.3% as of January 2012, not 100%. So don't ever assume that everyone know what happened like you did. You get the privileges to read what's not on the news while the rest don't. What you can do is go out and tell those who don't what they should know instead making echoes with someone who knew. The rule is simple, influencing those who are opposing you because social media is not the tool to determine who will be our government.

The comings days are crucial. It is truly a great news to know that Malaysia have voter turnout of 80%  while the Canada has only 61.4% in 2011 and UK 65.1% in 2010. So starting to believe in your own self. Start to educate yourself about how the election works and how many seats a party has to win to become the federal government. And if you did please educate others about what you know and what is the truth. Tell them why and how they can contribute to the country because everyone of us is equally important. This, make the second hope.

It all starts with you. The path of revolution is never easy but in the end the truth is worth the risk. Be it good or bad, here, us, we all who are reading this are the one who hold the responsibility for our country's future undertakings.

You say there are five more years of darkness ahead. I say you are one day closer to the day where everything is clean and democracy wins. Don't ever lose your faith. You might not have the full control to choose who take the parliament and states seats, but you have the power to retain your faith.

Democracy didn't died yesterday. It only died when you are not believing in it.

"The Truth is incontrovertible. Malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end, there it is" -Winston Churchill.

Salam Bersih and stay Faithful.

Pere

6 months gone.


I made a discovery since the last trip back home. As time goes by, I start to realized that it wasn't the way I thought it is. Then it came a time when I got struck by this epiphany that maybe he was right, I failed to see through the relationship and thought that it was meant to be so it should be. The onrush of the sensory world occupied my attention so fully that only left very few rooms for logical thinking.

I never ask for anything better because its not for me to ask and I shouldn't. I thought its gonna get better and beyond. But now I am really scared, I scare one day I might even start to hate the very same thing that I stood up to fight for.
I am afraid that I might become those people whom I despise. Yet another side of me tells me that its okay to hate since there is nothing to love at the first place.

I somehow felt the curtain is closing on me. Maybe it was a mistake since the start. Maybe its something that you were forced upon and the only way is to blindfold your heart to go forward, or maybe its not a way at all since it doesnt offer alternative.

Thank you, for this good life, and forgive me for not loving enough.

The catch is, go on and never look back.